Sunday, April 18, 2004
ok.well. i'm pissed! for the past 3 days. i've been coming online rather often. i juz come online to get rid of all the anger in me. haiz. today my mom invited her uncle frm london over to our house. he came wif his daughter and 2 grandchildren (tasmeen and brendon). ok. hmm.. they're nice pple. but one things for sure. they're leaving singpaore with a bad impression on me. the other day when i went to visit them. i was in a bad mood, 'coz i was too tired. now i'm in a bad mood too. arghh. my brother. haiz. tt guy hates me to the cored. i knew it. he juz hates me. ok. den juz now we argued. my mom scolded me. he started it. he was being lame and childish. but i'm the one at fault 'coz i screamed. ok. i'm at fault! den later my cousins come over. den they tagged the X-box. i;ve got nth against tt. but the thing is.. lionel and sateesh keep playing it. they not onli not let others play they also chase away the ppLe who come to view theier so-called "skills"! arghh.. i'm pissed! i was supposed to study yesterday. but i ended up having house work to do. i'm not blaming anyone here. so i didnt study. when i finally got the time to do e-maths. my brother started doing all sorts of things to get my attention. and worsely. kept constantly toking to me. and whenever he speaks to me. he expects me to lok at him. WAT THE HELL MAN! i ended up onli doing 15 questions in 2 hours. as for today. i'm supposed to do alot of things. sundays. lots of time. but now these pple are here. i'm not saying tt they shouldnt be here. i'm really bored. i've got nth to do. but when i go lock myself in my room. to do work. tts when they need me the most. pam go shop. pam where's this? pam where's that? pam go eat lunch. PAM! PAM! PAM! how i wish pam is dead. during lunch my parents noticed tt i was gloomy. i'm surprised! den my mom asked if my nose was giving me problems. i said "its not as if onli my nose is giving me problem ritez?" they didnt seem to get it. or maybe they juz didnt want to hear it. in fact. my nose is giving me problems. my house is giving me problems. my brother is giving me problems. my school is giving me problems. my friends are giving me problems. my family is giving me problems. my studies are giving me problems. my everything is giving me problems. i am giving myslef problems. I AM A PROBLEM MYSELF!! arghh. i dun think i shud blame anyone but myself for this. i'm stupid. i;m useless. i'm dumb! mid year is coming. and see where i stand. i do no see anything. i doubt i can make it. my o's. forget about jc. can i even enter a poly? haiz. i'm a slacker. i'm HOPELESS!! i havent started revision. i have less than a week. LESS THAN A WEEK! mid yr. then prelims. then O' LEVELS!
the subjects which i predict to do v. badly:
english. lit paper 2. a-maths. physics. chemistry. history. ss.
okok. let me say the subjects i predict tt i wun do badly but not do well either:
e-maths, higher tamil and lit paper 1.
see the difference? i am heading a path filled with doom! yea! pam is going to die. pam is going to die. [note: die here means get myself in deep shit and not kill myself. i'm a coward still.and i dun dare take away my life! ]
its now 3.44pm. and i;m feeling lyk this. hmmm.. nvm. muz be those pre-monday blues. i think i betta go. byebye!
